Advertising Policy

Last updated: June 4, 2026 · Applies to every ad submitted to the auction slot and the Advertiser Graveyard.

This is a satire site with a real ad slot. To keep it fun and safe for everyone scrolling, every ad must follow this policy. Submitting an ad means you agree to it. We review ads automatically on submission and by hand after they go live, and we can remove anything that breaks these rules at any time.

How the slot works (read this before you pay)

• King of the hill. You pay to take the live slot. You hold it until someone pays more. There is no minimum duration — your ad could be live for a long time or for seconds.
• All sales are final and non-refundable. You are paying for display until outbid, not for a guaranteed amount of time. When you're outbid, you are not refunded.
• Dethroned ads go to the Graveyard permanently, with your brand, creative, the amount you paid, and how long you reigned.
• We can remove an ad that violates this policy with no refund. Paying does not buy the right to break the rules.

What you can advertise

Real brands, products, services, projects, launches, portfolios, "hire me" pitches, memes, and good-natured jokes. If it's honest and wouldn't make a stranger uncomfortable, it's probably fine.

Every ad needs: a brand name, a headline, short body copy, a destination URL, and (optionally) a 1200 × 628px image. The URL must go to a real, working, on-topic page.

What you can't advertise — prohibited content

Ads will be rejected or removed if they contain, link to, or promote:

• Sexual or adult content — pornography, nudity, escort/"adult" services, sexual products.
• Content involving minors — anything sexualizing or endangering people under 18. Zero tolerance; reported where required.
• Scams & deceptive money schemes — "guaranteed returns," crypto doublers, pump-and-dumps, Ponzi/MLM recruitment, fake giveaways, phishing, get-rich-quick.
• Malware & abuse — links to malware, deceptive downloads, fake login pages, redirect chains, or anything that harms the visitor or their device.
• Hate & harassment — content attacking or dehumanizing people based on race, ethnicity, national origin, religion, sex, gender identity, sexual orientation, disability, age, or similar; targeted harassment of any individual.
• Violence & extremism — graphic violence, gore, terrorist or violent-extremist content, incitement.
• Illegal goods & regulated categories — illegal drugs, weapons/firearms and parts, counterfeit goods, stolen data, fake documents/IDs, unlicensed gambling, tobacco/vapes to minors, prescription drugs without authorization.
• Impersonation & IP theft — pretending to be a person, brand, or government; using a logo or trademark you don't have the right to use; passing off someone else's work.
• Personal data — exposing or selling anyone's private information ("doxxing").
• Self-harm — content that promotes or instructs self-harm, suicide, or eating disorders.
• Political & election content — paid political ads, candidate or ballot-measure advocacy, and coordinated political messaging are not accepted on this slot.
• Misleading claims — false or unsubstantiated claims, fake urgency, bait-and-switch destinations.

When in doubt, we err on the side of removing it. Our call is final.

How review works

• Automatic screening on submission. Your headline, copy, URL, and image are checked by automated moderation. Clean ads can go live as soon as payment clears.
• Human review after going live. We also review live ads by hand and may remove anything that breaks this policy.
• Held ads. If automated screening flags your ad, it goes to manual review before any charge. We may approve it, ask you to change it, or decline it. Declined-before-payment ads are never charged.

Enforcement

• We may reject, hold, edit-request, or remove any ad at our discretion.
• Removal for a policy violation is final and non-refundable, and the ad may be archived in the Graveyard marked as removed.
• Chargebacks result in immediate removal and a ban from future bidding.
• Repeat or serious violations (especially anything involving minors or illegal content) may be reported to the appropriate authorities and result in a permanent ban.

Contact

Questions, takedown requests, or think we got it wrong? Email contact@theunemployable.xyz.

UNEMPLOYABLE™ is a satire site and is not affiliated with any brand shown elsewhere on it. Ads are paid placements by third parties and do not imply our endorsement.